Keeping it Strictly Friends with Benefits

Wed, 04/24/2013 - 10:49 -- amber

What would you rather have, a one night stand of friends with benefits? I personally believe that a friends with benefits relationship is much healthier since they do not put you at risk of sleeping around with strangers you barely know a thing about. With friends with benefits though, you have to be extra careful in order as to not compromise the friendship over sex.

The ten rules of maintaining a friends’ with benefits relationship include:

1 - Setting ground rules regarding how constantly the two of you should keep in touch and how regularly you should meet and where.

2 - Never falling in love with your ‘friend’ will help you keep the friendship longer and the sex much enjoyable. Falling in love is what kills most of these relationships. At the same time, it is the hardest to follow.

3 - Keep the relationship between just the two of you.

4 - Telling your friends about it who may in turn gossip about it to other people may make your friend uncomfortable hence break it off.

5 - If you have more than one friend with benefits, ensure that they are not connected with each other in any way. It’s much less riskier and spares you having to deal with jealousy issues.

6 - Do not include your very good long term friends in this. Sex can easily mess up that friendship in a matter of minutes. When looking for a friend with benefit partner, do not go for the good friend but rather your acquaintances.

7 - Do not get involved with someone who is in a committed relationship with another person. The last thing you want in your life are scandals. Therefore, only go for friends with benefits who are in the same shoes as you are.

8 - Never discuss your personal lives with each other. As a matter of fact, you should convince yourself that you already got a partner out there so as to avoid the chances of transforming your friend with benefit to your girl/boyfriend.

9 - Do not obsess over them or get clingy. Always remember that it’s only about the sex and he/she is not your lover. If it’s not about the sex, let it rest.

10 - If you find yourself slipping away, simply let your friend know that you are involved with someone else. It may hurt them at first but at least, it will help save the friendship.

Never take the sex out of the bedroom for instance by going on dates. Bringing him/her outside the bedroom, that’s a clear indication that you want to be more than just friends with benefits.

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Amber Hoffman

I am writer and editor at Bedroom Stories online magazine, writing about sexual relationships and better understanding our lives. Feel free to contact me at [email protected]