Can Friends Ever Be Lovers?

Can Friends Ever Be Lovers?

Thu, 11/22/2012 - 17:53 -- zena

Many people often ask this question. Although many men are more susceptible to this. Many friends who fall in this situation are those who have known each other almost forever and sometimes for some people, they believe that taking it to the next step is both risky and uncomfortable although they know that if things will go according to their plan then, there should be good news along with it. Being attached to someone for many years doesn't guarantee that you will both work out romantically. Sometimes, you are better off friends than lovers to begin with. Sometimes attraction happens when you least expect it. The timing can also be off but hormones are hormones. You can't really control that. Honestly, attraction usually happens due to many other factors. One of them is when one feels threatened that somebody else will take their friend away. That's when obsession starts. Competition brings out that kind of attraction which you never thought was there before. Another factor is the thought that your friend is the best for you and there will no one but him/her for you. Such a belief might not be justifiable but it does make sense to some people.

But why is it that some friends don't end up being lovers? Well, it is not just because some people are afraid of rejection. Some people actually don't want to push to the next level because somehow they don't see the challenge in it any longer. Having known each other for a long time is enough to make you feel like there is nothing more you don't know about the other people. Where is the excitement in that? Aside from that, sometimes your friend might not actually be that perfect. There might actually be things that you might not know about your friend. What if he/she is a player and might just end up make a play for you? I don't think that would be a memorable experience for you. If one wants commitment while the other doesn't then that is going to be a big fire that you must not both play with as both of you might just get hurt. It is hard to assume if your friend is attracted to you. You might be attracted to him or her but your friend might just not be as attracted to you as you are to him/her. Why risk ruining such a beautiful relationship by letting that ruin everything?

To be lovers or to stay friends? It is all up to you. If you really want to push your luck and try something more with your friend then it is time to get serious. Consider if he/she is interested in you. How do you do that? Simple. Go out with your friend and make sure that there is just the two of you there. Do not come on to him/her. It is best for him/her to do it. He/She must show initiative. That is your clue to show your initiative as well. Showing interest first wouldn't be good and might be a turn off for your friend. If you don't show any interest first, rejection would be easier for you somehow. How do you challenge your friend to test his/her interest in you? Start talking about other people. Tell him/her how much you like how they look and much you dig them. Honestly, you shouldn't be doing that but since you want your friend to be more challenged to come after you then push him/her to their limits. You can't choose to be out of the friend zone by yourself. Always remember that your friend needs to choose to be out of it as well. Good luck!

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Zena Alethea Teofilo

Zena is an online English teacher. She enjoys writing and drawing during her free time. She writes many different articles and stories every day. Some are erotic in nature while others are informative. Writing for this website has opened her to a new world of possibilities. She is happy to share her thoughts and opinions about many things in life. She just hopes that many people are satisfied with her work for she aims to please.