5 ways on how to get your guy to open up more

Tue, 04/23/2013 - 10:54 -- maiya

We all know that men and women are different. Not only on the basis of their genders but also the way they think, expect and respond. Normally guys are considered to be quiet and not sharing much about what’s going on in their minds and when they don’t speak when we really want to hear them, misunderstanding occurs that turns into ugly fights. But the question that arises here is that are men really speak and share less than a women or they are not speaking and sharing because of some other reasons. If it is assumed that later part is true then how can we help our guys to open up more?

It is true that men speak less than women but on other hand it is also a fact that once guys starts speaking up then they will beat you too but the things that stops them from speaking and sharing is much that men most of the time finds it hard to speak and share particularly with the person who is in intimate relationship with them. However, once the guys build up the trust on you, they won’t be able to restrict themselves from not talking much and sharing. In fact you will be surprise that they will make you stay up all night by just their talks. They also feel the need of someone just like women with whom they can share everything. All you need to identify right time, place, and questions to be asked and be the one to initiate things between you two. But before going on the hunt for right time, place and above mentioned things you need to understand what you guy thinks, why doesn’t he speak much and share things and what are those factors that is restricting him from opening up.

When we hear the word man, the picture that comes into our minds is string, macho, egoistic and tough which is true. The egos of men are much more fragile than women and one of the reasons behind this fragility is that the men are way more sensitive than women. Although most of the men will not agree to it but deep down it is a fact which bruises their egos more easily. Guys always feel pride over their image and reputation in your mind and they hesitate to open up and share just because they think that they will end up saying something which will not go with their personality and image that you have in your minds. Guys are scared of rejections and humiliations. They can’t tolerate anyone cracking jokes at something they have shared. It hurts them and if you do so in case of something he speaks totally unexpected and you laugh at it, trust me they won’t tell you anything again. So it is important to listen to them carefully, understand what they are saying and respond in a way that encourages him and makes him feel that you accept him the way he is and he can share any kind of thing no matter how silly it is with you.

When guys are opening up with you be ready to meet up their high expectations. The more they are sharing themselves with you the more they will expect from you and wants you to reveal yourself and secrets as well.

Guys just don’t like talking about the things in past which were not good enough to remember or to talk about again somewhere in future. However, if you bring up those things back, will tell about it to others, misunderstood him or will tell him every chance you get he will simple get disappointed and will not open up with you. So let the past be stay in past if you really want your guy to open up with you.

If he is sharing something with you, listen to him calmly and don’t interrupt. If he is telling you about his past affairs let him share and don’t make fuss out of it because it is the reality that you will not get someone pure and totally honest. So if he is saying and telling something to you, let him do it. Be a good listener and don’t over react, don’t show him that you are insecure and you don’t trust him because the once your guy will get your this insight he will not get turn off but will not be confident anymore to open up in front of you. Instead give your guy positive feedback and make him feel that you trust them completely and your relationship is strong enough to safeguard you from all kind of insecurities.

Lastly, always be there for him whenever he expects you and even at times when he doesn’t expect you. If you will be dedicated towards your guy and will be loyal to him then he will also do everything for you. But remember that your presence doesn’t seem forceful or it makes your guy that you are predicting and sweating over to make yourself look sweet and understanding. Therefore, be natural and be yourself. Be true to yourself and rest of the things will be easy.

Maiya Hashmi

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