My back story is simple enough. I was married for 7 years and then divorced. I focused on raising my wonderful child and then decided to start dating after 5 years. I found a wonderful person to laugh, hold, and make love to. Then one day on her own adventure in life she accepted a job on the other side of the country. My first thoughts were of her. I wanted her to be a successful and accomplished woman. We both knew that long distant relationships were difficult. I was not able to follow her because that would force me to leave my daughter behind and simply was not ready for that.
My girl friend and I said our goodbyes and wished each other luck. We kept in communication and are still friends to this day. My real surprise was when she called me after seven months and informed me that she was dating someone else. What could I do? I knew that this was going to happen. We agreed that our romantic relationship was over when she moved. I wished her the best of luck and told that she would always be held as a friend in my mind and heart.
I was heartbroken not that she had found someone else but that I was replaced so quickly. I too am burdened with the male ego. It took me about a month to let her go in my mind. I am not a robot. I told myself. It is time to move on but move on to what? The answer was dating scene of course. The dating scene brings back images of rejection for some and promiscuity for others. I lay somewhere in between. I had many questions. Did I want a hundred dates or just one? Was I looking for friends, friends with benefits, discreet relationships, or just jump right into a committed relationship if such a thing were possible?
I decided to get back on the dating site I had meet my previous girlfriend and see what my appeal would generate. I was a complete surprise to me that woman started to contact me before I even paid the admission fee. What had happen? I could barely get women to respond last time and now they are willing to seek me out.
Women gave me phone numbers, email addresses, and started to chat with me online. I was excited, not for the idea of having sex with these women as well many might think is the only thing that is on a man’s mind, but with the possibility of meeting like minded women and that much wanted feeling of being wanted.
I was answering emails, responding to chats, and wondering if I should actually call one of the women that gave me their numbers. I overcame that first time anxiety and started texting someone. Then we talked one night. I could not have been more tongue tied or awkward. We ended up talking about sex for hours. What both described what we liked in bed, when the last time we both had sex and what we would do to each other when we meet. The conversation was totally contradictory to what you were supposed to talk about before going on a first date. Then I remembered a movie I had recently watched. There are ‘No Rules’ was the message that stuck in my mind.
The date is set for this Sunday. I will drive an hour and half to the middle of nowhere Texas to meet her for the first time. Will we have sex? Will we even like each other when we meet? I have no answers, no preconceived notions, and absolutely no judgments. I have no idea how this date will go. It will be an adventure no matter what happens. Isn’t that what dating is suppose to be?