I was hanging out at my apartment tonight when a girl I met a few months ago started texting me, explicitly asking me to have sex with her, when we've only made out in the past. She said she had a few drinks and since I was sober, I agreed to drive to her place which is about 15 minutes away. As I arrive, I learn she lives with her parents and she says we can't do it there. I did not want this girl staying at my place overnight, nor did I want to drive back and forth that distance. I remember reading Public Sex: Top 10 Choices and I asked her if there was anywhere we could go in public, and she lead us to a park.
It was pitch black in the park as we walked for a bit and found a grassy area near a pavilion. We started making out, she got naked, and after a while I tried to go down on her. She stopped me, saying she had never had that done before. I was a bit surprised as she's 21 and was in a relationship for a while. Anyways, I convinced her to let me try it and she didn't like it. Whatever, maybe I put on a bad performance.
She then blew me for a few minutes, which she was just alright at. After a while, it was time for the main course. I walked her over to the pavilion and laid her on her back on a picnic table (classy, I know). Standing at the edge of the table, I try to insert. I have some trouble, but finally get it in, and she screams in pain. I pull out and asked her what was wrong. "It's too big," she answered. This confused me, as I'm a white guy that is average on a good day. We tried again, I got it in one more time, and she yelled again.
After I pulled out, she said "I'm sorry... did you finish yet?" "Huh?," I replied. "Didn't you ejaculate?" I laughed.
I then learned that she literally thought sex always consisted of "one or two pumps, at most." She told me that her ex-boyfriend was the only guy she had ever had sex with. He had a tiny dick and she said she would be lucky if he got one or two pumps in before blowing it. I asked her if she's ever watched porn, to which she replied no. It turns out that her incompetent ex-boyfriend had given her a really sad, warped perception of sex.
Anyways, we try again, and it goes better on this try. I'm plowing away, slowly but surely, when I see headlights about 50 yards away in the park. Fuck. I go faster. The car is coming our way. Faster. It's definitely coming our way. "We gotta stop" I yell, as I run back to the grass where our clothes are. She follows, and we lay down to hide as the car passes.
After that, it just wasn't gonna happen. We walked back to my car. Half-way there, I realize I had blue balls and a condom on my limp dick for good measure.